Times like this makes me wish that i have my own child. So that i can right the wrongs my parents did. I wouldn't destroy her self esteem. I wouldn't side with others. I wouldn't judge her. You're gay? OKAY! You hate wearing skirts? OKAY! You wanna tshirts all the time? SURE WHY NOT. I don't see the problem. You're a guy who likes doing ballet, a girl who likes guns? That's fine. You're interested in doing seemingly impossible tasks? Sure, give it a go :D Even if you fail, it's alright. You tried. I won't laugh at you. A blind girl can become chef. A guy without hands can play the guitar. Who's to say you can't achieve whatever goal you have? You wanna learn seemingly useless things? Archery, fencing etc? Why not! Life experiences is good. It's still a skill. Who knows, you might be super good at it and have a future in that. I'll be proud of your decisions. As long as it's not things like murder or something. You done badly in an exam? You're going into ITE? I'm sure you would do great :) When people asks, i would proudly say my child is in ITE right now. I will never bring you down. I'll hold you up high. I won't bring you into this world only to cause you so much pain. As long as you're happy, i'm happy.
I know reality and the truth sucks but i'm still human. It still hurts. I know i look like i don't give a crap about anything but i do. Just because i'm very expressive doesn't mean i have to express EVERYTHING. Just because it's not shown doesn't mean it doesn't exist. We're humans. We're humane. We forget that sometimes. I wish i can give my life to someone else who deserve it more than i do. Maybe like the movie In Time. I have way too much time that i don't deserve. Not using it wisely. Why not give it to someone who is running out of time and actually have a purpose in their life?
No worries. I'll get over this soon enough. Jasmin never wallows in self pity for too long! The sun will always come up... I can't wait to start collecting Life Scouts badges.
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