Sunday, April 15, 2012

time travelllllll but not really

Hello blog. I'm going on a journey to find back myself. WHERE IS THE GIRL THAT USED TO BE HAPPY ALL THE TIME?! THE INNOCENT LITTLE GIRL. THE NORMAL LITTLE KIDDO WHO JUST WANTED TO PLAY. NOT THIS SCREWED UP ASSHOLE WHO THINKS TOO MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING. 
SEE. WHERE ARE YOU. WHERE ARE YOU. COME BACK. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO BE THINKING ALL THE TIME? ABOUT EVERYTHING? IT'S TIRING. Anyways, i'mma read some of my old blog posts. From like 2009. Yes, i still keep them ;) BUAHAHAHA. 

Holy shit, i used to be so thick skin?! I was saying things like "I love myself, i love my smile. I'm cute" DAFUQ??! My self esteem level has obviously dropped drastically since then... The confident me, where are you? T.T Come back...? I referred to myself as a NARCISSIST?! 

I used alot of singlish? LIKE A HELL LOT. All the "seh, siol, leh, la" 

I used to be so obsessed with Selena Gomez... 

I used to be so afraid of being mistaken as a lesbian/bisexual. LMFAO. JASMIN AH JASMIN. Now i'm proud of being one man. I WANNA ANNOUNCE IT TO THE WHOLE DAMN WORLD. HEY I LOVE GIRLS BECAUSE THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL AND AWESOME. 

OH MY GOD MY BEARBEAR USED TO BE SO... WHITE? AND FAT. Compared to now... Holy shit. I still love you tho :3

I still want lip piercings.

I told myself that i would never fall in love and love is stupid. Well, i was right. Love is stupid but i fell in love anyways. And it left me broken. I should have listened to myself.

I was really pervertic. HAHA. Or should i say immature? If you still think i'm immature now, fuck you. HAHA. That makes me seem immature. I can reassure you, i'm not. I can have a very sophisticated conversation with you and i actually enjoy it! Try me :D

Oh damn it's 6am already. I shall stop here for now. 

To sum it up, i'm so messed up in the head right now T.T Last time even when bad things happened, it was just... on the surface? Like small little conflicts that are easily solved. But this time, i'm in a conflict with myself. I'm in a war with myself, with things that don't exist. 

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