She has got me locked up tighter than I thought

She's a quick licking pleasure sucker

Hotter than a motherfucker

And she knows who she is

And she gives me whatever I want

And i think of her as my vacation from myself

As she goes off with someone else

Singing is really tiring :o I take my hat off to all the singers. I mean they have to do shows for a few days straight and sing continuously for at least an hour everyday. Plus they have to dance around and shit. I sing for half an hour my voice cui banana already. OH WELL. This is why they are singers and i'm just a kiddo sitting at home infront of my computer.

Now whenever shit happens, i have something to push me on. KATY PERRY AND MAROON 5. OMG. September!! Persevering for you guys. I'mma live till that day!!!!

#1: Inspired by true events.

The sky was tinted orange and the leaves rustled among the wind. The first drop of rain had just pierced through the night sky and before you knew it, the city was shrouded in darkness by a heavy downpour. I looked out the window, took a deep breath and stepped out the door. The zombies were nowhere to be seen due to the rain. Or maybe they were there but i just couldn't see them. "This is it.", i thought to myself. "It's now or never." I made sure the coast is clear and with my target vaguely in sight, i bolted off. I ran as fast as my legs could take me. Suddenly, a sharp pain in my stomach grabbed onto me, urging me to give up. The hunger was overwhelming. "No, not now Jasmin! You're gonna make it. It's so close." I quickly diverted that pain by concentrating on the task at hand: Getting to the store. 

After what seems like an eternity, i made it! I stumbled into the store, landing face first on the concrete floor. "That would've been embarrassing if there were actually people around." i thought to myself. I chortled and got back on my feet, shaking off the water on me as i go. The store was pretty much the same as it was before. Only that this time, the shelves were empty, broken lights were hanging off the ceiling, the wallpaper was peeling off, the friendly old lady at the counter was gone and of course, the world has ended. I could feel this pinch of sadness building up inside me so i erased that thought and moved on to the next task at hand: Finding something to eat and drink.

I clumsily rummaged through the shelves and boxes. NOTHING! I pushed on. Halfway through and still nothing. "Have i went through all that for nothing?" i thought to myself. I punched the shelved beside me in a moment of fury and something fell from the top and hit me hard on the head. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!" i screamed. I looked to see what hit me and it was a bottle of water. In disbelief, i slowly approached it while rubbing my eyes a few times to make sure i wasn't hallucinating. My hands slowly reached out and finally came in contact with the bottle. I held it tight and close to me like it was my own baby. "Finally..." i thought to myself. 

Just as i was about to break open the bottle and savor the goodness within, i heard a moan coming from the other end of the store. ZOMBIES! How could i have forgotten that i was still in a zombie apocalypse?! All i was thinking about was the food and i have completely forgotten about the other more dangerous thing! Even though all i got was a bottle of water, it was enough. I wasn't going to risk my life. Thankfully it hasn't spotted me so i had the chance to slip out the front door and ran back to the safe house. I quickly shut the door behind me and heaved a sigh of relief. Holding the bottle triumphantly, i popped open the top and carefully eased it towards my lips, making sure not to make any spills. As the water flowed down my throat, i leaned my head back and basked in the moment of satisfaction. Who knew water could taste so good?

-Jasmin

I'M REALLY. LOST. WHAT AM I? WHO AM I? I'M SO CONFUSED. FOR NO REASON AT ALL THIS IS SUDDENLY A PROBLEM. OMG I HATE THESE MOMENTS!!!!! I don't need too much, i don't need anything else, i just need somebody to love. Just let me love you. 

MOVING ON TO THE HAPPIER THINGS

 I AM GOING TO THE SINGAPORE GRANDPRIX. Or F1. Or whatever you prefer to call it. HOLY SHIIIIIIITTTTTSSSSSSSSS. WITH MY LAU SOCK GHIM. OH DEAR OH DEAR SO EGGCITED I'MMA SEE MY BABYGIRL T.T

AND FOR FINALLY, MY BABYBOYY. 30 YEARS OLD AND STILL SEXY. YAYYYYYYYY

misguided

I just re-watched Ugly Betty to get some inspiration for my life!! Or something. LOL. I have learnt alot. Goodbyes are shit but they are not going to stop happening. So we should just accept it and decide whether it's a good thing or a bad one... BE FEARLESS. Step out of your comfort zone. Do something you wouldn't usually do. I love it when the characters show a totally different side of themselves. Ahhh i love this show!! I shall not spazz over this... 

Well it seems like there has been a change of events. I just got rejected. HAHA FEELS VERY ROUGH TO BE REJECTED BY AN ITE. Well, screw you too. Kidding. I was just so torn between staying and leaving and now i guess they have made the choice for me. No need stress already! Don't worry i'm not stopping my education forever. I will get back on the horse next year. Retake my o levels and see what happens. I wasted a year of my life and i'm going to waste like 2 more because i didn't know what i want in my life. I made all the wrong choices because i thought i could just wing it. Now i know and sort of have a plan. Let's hope it's not too late. God, i feel so old. Don't worry i'm not disheartened by this! I'm still as cheery as ever and i will always be :D 

Y U SO PRETTY

Holy shit what happen to blogger. Kinda annoying when they change the layout I'M SO CONFUSED RIGHT NOW. Anyways, this is Chloe Moretz. SO FUCKING PRETTY OMG. And she's only 15. DOES SHE LOOK 15?! NO RIGHT OMG. It feels so wrong for me to be like all over her -.-" Please grow up so i can love you without feeling like a pedo. HAHAHA. She's gonna be so hot when she grows up. CANNOT WAIT FOR IT HAHAHA WHAT JASMIN 

NOT GONNA SLEEP AGAIN. Later gonna be zombie. I'm just... really hungry. "I'm on this new diet where i don't eat anything but when i feel like fainting, i'll just eat a cube of cheese." Kidding. Later morning go 7/11 buy shizz yayyyy i love having one so near to meee

-pats myself on the back-

I went out yesterday with MAWADDAH. My long lost mummy. Cheh. So long never see her already. Still as evil as ever. She wanna see people choke on cherries xp WEIRDO. HAHA KIDDING!! I can honestly say i love spending money on other people. I mean i could have use it to buy all the things i want. I have so much things on my wishlist but i think i prefer getting things for other people! Not trying to buy people over with money. I just like seeing them happy :D MAKING OTHER PEOPLE HAPPY MAKES ME HAPPY!!! I don't expect anything back! I mean just a "thank you" will suffice :D SO DON'T FEEL GUILTY OKAY. Silly silly people. I will never do things that are against myself. Never once did i look back and say "Damn, i shouldn't have spend so much on her." and i will never say things like "Being alone is nice! I can have more money to spend on myself." I'm not referring to anybody here. Or am i? 

POSER AH THIS GIRL. YOU CAN SEE MY FATS!!!

OKAYYYYYYY I WANT TO LEARN ARCHERY. Super random but it seems interesting. Influenced by Daryl and the Hunger Games? Hmm. Prepare for zombie apocalypse ah. Can't wait for my guitar lesson to start on the 13th of May!! I'm trying to learn a few notes now tho. Like learn abit before it starts. Wah jasmin suddenly so motivated to do things WHAT HAPPEN TO YOU. It's good. Considering to work first... Then i can learn my guitar and shit. Then i retake my o levels and try to get into psychology in POLY! If all else fails, i will use the money i've saved and earned from work and get a private diploma? Hmm.

"Why don't you take a seat over there?"

I enjoy understand how human mind's work. Like what makes them do things. For example, criminals! I like to try and relate myself to them? Uh how do i put this like imagine being in their shoes and what drives them to kill/rape/rob people etc. I think i can understand and feel most of them but i can't understand.... pedophiles. Why am i even talking about this? LOL. I've been watching this show "To Catch A Predator" and it's basically about catching pedophiles... I can't wrap my mind around it... Why would you prefer a child...? The people in the show prey on 13 year olds but there are other incidents out there where they do stuff to like 5 years old. WHY. SERIOUSLY. They aren't even.... developed in any way?! SERIOUSLY!!! I can understand you if you rape a woman like a grown woman BUT WHY KIDS. WHY. WHAT THE FUCK!!!! God it's so disgusting. But the show is interesting tho. Seeing them catch the pedophiles and them trying to make up stories XD AND ALSO SOME OF THE GUYS ACTUALLY LOOK PRETTY... GOOD? Very rare la... BUT STILL HAVE. Y U DO THIS

The Twits - Roald Dahl

Reading my favorite childhood book made me feel guilty about wanting to be evil. I'm sorry. No ugly thoughts :) Not even about the people i hate! P.s how do you pronounce the authors name...? I never knew... He is really such a brilliant man. The things he comes up with are so creative like where the hell do you get that idea from?! It sounds ridiculous yet it works. I take my hat off to you!! SO MUCH RESPECT!!!! 

only youuuuuu~

It's probably nothing but i feel so guilty for not posting much about her T.T I'm sorry... I STILL LOVE YOU OBVIOUSLY. April 18th was the 3rd year of me loving youuuuuuu. No regrets. You're the only person who can affect me that much. Like seriously just a picture of you can make me feel... just indescribable. YOUR PERFECTION!! THAT FACE!! IT JUST MAKES ME ASDKJALSD. I will literally have tears welling up in my eyes. 

You make me such a dork :3 Everything you do is just extra awesome. STOP BEING SO PRETTY SERIOUSLY AKSJDLAKJSD My little heart can't handle your awesomeness :3 -imaginary hug- I love you forever and i mean it. My next tattoo goes out to you my babygirl. Just wait!! 

I'm really tempted to get like a tattoo of this on my back.

LIKE JUST COVERING MY WHOLE DAMN BACK. Good idea? Horrible idea? This is Altair btw. Not Ezio. Even tho i like Assassin's Creed and all, i don't actually know... the storyline... and stuff... Heh. SORRY. BUT I DO KNOW ALTAIR, EZIO AND DESMOND. THAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT PART RIGHT? I wanna be covered in tatttooooooooooooos

"I'm picking up my blaster, put it on my side."

This bloody song is stuck in my head. LOL. I never liked the original Jason Derulo version until i heard this parody. Freaking awesome!! Even when i'm listening to the original, at the chorus the line "I'M HAN SOLO I'M HAN SOLO" just keeps popping into my head x.x Don't get why people is hating on this though. COME ON, DON'T TAKE IT SO SERIOUSLY!! LOOSEN UP A LIL AND ENJOY IT :D

This could be paradise.

This is a pretty darn nice view. Got it from tumblr. I think an Assassin's Creed costume would give me the courage i need. I've made so many stupid mistakes. Fallen so many times. From now onwards, not anymore. I swear. NOT ANYMORE. I've said this before and i have obviously failed -.-" COME ON COME ON. I WANT TO DO SOMETHING. BUT WHAT? I don't know. So for now i'll just... lay on my bed all day. Paradise by Coldplay is seriously a fucking awesome song... Please bury me in an Assassin's Creed costume and play this song at my funeral when i die.

P.S I'M NOT THINKING OF SUICIDE!! I realize its easily implied when i say things like that. 
But naw. I'm not done with life yet :D There are still things i have to do...

Having a shitty day? Need to just empty your mind and relax?

LISTEN TO THIS MAN SING. It works wonders. I love you <3

I've been receiving alot of compliments lately. I don't know why. I don't know how to accept them...? And i still don't agree with them ah. I mean i'm not thick skin duh. BUT ONE OF MY OLD NEIGHBOURS SAID SOMETHING VERY... i feel like it's exaggerated. I'm not even making this up hor and i don't agree with it but here is what she said. She said it to my mum ah.

"Because your daughter is so pretty right, there are people who will be envious of her and want to destroy that. They can't be like her so they wanna make her like them."

She said it in chinese uh. My translation. I'm like HUH SERIOUSLY? NO LOL. JUST NO. That is abit too much LOL. If i'm pretty then Katy Perry is like... I don't know what already. She's already a goddess nowwwww ~.~ AHHHHHHHHH SHE MAKES ME SO HAPPYYYYYYYY. 

ANYWAYS MAROON 5 JUST RELEASED A NEW SONG! Loving it. Can't wait for their new album in June! OVEREXPOSED BITCHES!!!

I dreamt that i had this urge to just jump out the window. No, not committing suicide. I was about to do the LEAP OF FAITH. I grabbed all my stuff and and opened the window and i was so ready!! Until my mum came and ask me OI WHAT YOU DOING. Then i'm like i don't know... And i didn't... WOULD BE AWESOME TO DO IT THO? But instead of landing in a pile of hay, i'll just land right on the concrete floor. Ouch.

~.~

I feel so trapped.

time travelllllll but not really

Hello blog. I'm going on a journey to find back myself. WHERE IS THE GIRL THAT USED TO BE HAPPY ALL THE TIME?! THE INNOCENT LITTLE GIRL. THE NORMAL LITTLE KIDDO WHO JUST WANTED TO PLAY. NOT THIS SCREWED UP ASSHOLE WHO THINKS TOO MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING. 

SEE. WHERE ARE YOU. WHERE ARE YOU. COME BACK. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO BE THINKING ALL THE TIME? ABOUT EVERYTHING? IT'S TIRING. Anyways, i'mma read some of my old blog posts. From like 2009. Yes, i still keep them ;) BUAHAHAHA. 

Holy shit, i used to be so thick skin?! I was saying things like "I love myself, i love my smile. I'm cute" DAFUQ??! My self esteem level has obviously dropped drastically since then... The confident me, where are you? T.T Come back...? I referred to myself as a NARCISSIST?! 

I used alot of singlish? LIKE A HELL LOT. All the "seh, siol, leh, la" 

I used to be so obsessed with Selena Gomez... 

I used to be so afraid of being mistaken as a lesbian/bisexual. LMFAO. JASMIN AH JASMIN. Now i'm proud of being one man. I WANNA ANNOUNCE IT TO THE WHOLE DAMN WORLD. HEY I LOVE GIRLS BECAUSE THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL AND AWESOME. 

OH MY GOD MY BEARBEAR USED TO BE SO... WHITE? AND FAT. Compared to now... Holy shit. I still love you tho :3

I still want lip piercings.

I told myself that i would never fall in love and love is stupid. Well, i was right. Love is stupid but i fell in love anyways. And it left me broken. I should have listened to myself.

I was really pervertic. HAHA. Or should i say immature? If you still think i'm immature now, fuck you. HAHA. That makes me seem immature. I can reassure you, i'm not. I can have a very sophisticated conversation with you and i actually enjoy it! Try me :D

Oh damn it's 6am already. I shall stop here for now. 

To sum it up, i'm so messed up in the head right now T.T Last time even when bad things happened, it was just... on the surface? Like small little conflicts that are easily solved. But this time, i'm in a conflict with myself. I'm in a war with myself, with things that don't exist. 

12th April

WENT TO WILD WILD WET WITH THE LADIES. YAYYYY. It was Ragam's and Fatimah's first time there!!! Anyways, it was hilarious especially when we first took the huge ass slide. RAGAM WAS SCREAMING LIKE HELL HAHA OMG. And then there's the slide thingy that's like a U shape. Damn, i have no idea what their names are. EPICNESS. So much screaming. Even the seemingly fearless LAU SOCK GHIM screamed!!!!!!!! HOHO.

I know it's very cliche for friends to like take picture of their feets together but WHUTEVER XP

After that wanted to watch "Mirror, Mirror" at AMK hub but reached there then realize don't have. We didn't check beforehand... All 4 of us are not iPhone users!! YAY. Hahahaha. Went to the arcade instead. Spent all my money there x.x BUT IT WAS WORTH IT. Played House Of Dead 4 for like the second time? Or is it the first? Screaming like hell and shaking the gun like crazy. Ohhhhhhh good times. Goooood times. I wanna go back :( GO ARCADE AGAIN. COME ON COME ON

I have decided that i'mma go to wildwildwet anyways. HEHEHE. I'MMA RISK THIS TATTOO. Noooo. I'll protect it as much as i can... Please don't let anything happen to it. -fingers crossed-

The look in your eyes will turn to surprise

As you feel the pain and you realize

The one hurting you is somebody who once said 

"I love you."

Ahhh. Beautiful song!!! Never really thought about it before but i think i actually like Jazz music! I mean Maroon 5's 2nd album was sort of jazzy? Like the genre. Yesyes. Jazz is awesome. I COMPLETED L.A NOIRE!! It's the second game i've completed HAHAHA. ONLY. As much as i love games, i don't usually have the heart to finish it and stuff. The only 2 exceptions so far is Bully and L.A Noire. WooHOOOOooOoooo. CAN'T WAIT TO GO TO THE ZOO NEXT WEEK. HEHEHE. Had to cancel the wildwildwet trip because of my tattoo :( I'm sorry.

You're scared of the light that's inside of me

Do you know that there's a way out

You don't have to be held down

'Cause I used to be a shell

Yeah, I let her rule my world

But I woke up and grow strong

And I can still go on

and no one can take my pearl

You don't have to be a shell

You're the one that rules your world

You are strong and you'll learn that you can still go on

And you'll always be a pearl

so you kept me in the dark

HELL TO THE YEAH. SERIOUSLY. IT'S AS AWESOME AS I EXPECTED. THANK YOU DAD. SERIOUSLY. YOU. ARE. THE. MAN. 

in the shade of the night

The path of darkness is ever so tempting. Evil thoughts brewing. If only i didn't had any emotions. No fear. No love. No kindness. No compassion. Nothing. Oh the things i would do. The person i would be. The people i would step over. The lives i will destroy. I would love to have my hands stained with other people's blood... Such a beautiful sight.

we will come looking for you

I like the sound of our shoes walking on dirt paths. Also the sound of keychains banging each other on those hiker bag packs. Do you get what i'm trying to say? :/ I hope you do. Heh. It just feels like we're going on an adventure! Or escaping from zombies...